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Can You Listen as if You Had all the Time in the World?

“How do you get out of a conversation when someone needs to tell you something important and difficult in their lives, and you want to listen, but you have to finish your workout?” a friend asked me recently.

This friend and I often find ourselves approached—particularly at the gym for whatever reason!—by acquaintances, friends, and sometimes strangers, who want pour their hearts out to us. For me, I like to think it is because I project approachability. Body language, perhaps? Reputation?  She, as a mental health counselor, and myself, as a health coach, pride ourselves on being good listeners.

I wholeheartedly believe that true listening is a great gift to others, and it improves our own lives as listeners by strengthening connections and relationships. Yet listening in a meaningful way takes time–a slowing down–in a world that embraces fast pace and busy-ness.

In my favorite chapter in Herman Hesse’s Siddhartha, Vasudeva, the ferryman, teaches Siddhartha to listen deeply, become completely still, allowing Siddhartha to tell his whole story in his own time and in his own meandering way, and without passing judgement. As the two live together, they listen both to the sounds of the river and to people who cross their paths in this rare manner. Simply through truly listening to Siddhartha’s story, Vasudeva changed the man’s life, an important step to Siddhartha’s enlightenment.

I strive to improve my own listening in my practice as health coach and in my interactions throughout my day. As an extrovert, my particular challenge is to shut up and listen. Face it: anyone can give advice; not everyone makes time to listen or even understands how.

Listening is a practice I hold sacred. Still, my friend’s question is completely reasonable; how does one find a balance between the time we give to others and the time we spend on ourselves and our obligations?

And my friend is correct that we have this in common: both of us want to be there for people who come to us, and at the same time, both of us view workout time as also sacred. My friend was torn. She wanted to give of herself and her time, yet needed to figure out a way, at some point, to gracefully bow out of such conversations to give herself the time she deserved for herself and needed for other priorities.

The easy answer that came to me was to set boundaries. I know how to say, “Thank you for sharing this with me. I’d like to hear more, but I have to go now. Let’s find another time to talk again.” Good advice, but even as I heard myself say it aloud, I wondered, when do I remember actually saying something like that to disengage a conversation?

Perhaps I implicitly draw my own boundaries by simply knowing how much time I have to share at a particular moment and somehow people sense it and respect it? Maybe they sense when it’s a good time to talk or not, or end a conversation, by reading my body language? Humans are excellent at reading such cues, consciously or no. On the other hand, maybe I am not creating boundaries at all because I’d rather listen to someone’s story and get the warm feeling of helping another person rather than the less immediately rewarding work of getting back to my giant to-do list.

I scroll my memory through some of the times I had stopped and listened at the Y. I look for hints at what might be going on for me when people reach out. I try to recall when I might have felt torn and needed to consciously and graciously end such a conversation. But the examples that came to mind suggest just the opposite to me—that I tend to be generous with my time in a way that has felt completely comfortable to me, and I couldn’t remember when I’d needed to find a way to disengage.

I remembered the time I had been planning to get right back from the gym (I cannot remember what was so important to do) but instead found myself staying in the locker room for more a half an hour speaking to a friend who’d recently lost her husband. I left with the contented feeling that the time was well-spent because this friend needed someone to listen at that exact moment and I was lucky enough to be there and have the flexibility of my schedule to make time.

I recalled times I missed part of my workout listening and lending support to someone who was finding her way towards quitting smoking and losing weight. Far from begrudging her this time, I found myself invested in her getting healthy.

I thought to recent times when I offered a sounding board for someone considering a new career. I offered to get coffee with her to talk further, and still hope she takes me up on it.

Was it selective memory? I couldn’t recall my desire to share my time to listen to someone conflicting with my workout or getting things done in my life. Why or how was this so? Was I simply skillful at drawing boundaries as I’d suggested to my friend? And/Or was I investing in my chosen career by practice health coaching for free, and creating sales-pitch-free advertisement for what I do? Or had I lost sight of time boundaries altogether?

It would be nice if I just didn’t feel pressured by time as much as my friend does because I have very flexible time and I have no children. I have appointments and deadlines of course, and I am trying to build a business from scratch, but I can do this at my own pace and on my own time. I do often feel like I have the gift of opportunity to use my time according to my life priorities. And yet, I also often finish the day exhausted and with the sense that I haven’t gotten enough done on my to-do list to be satisfied. I’m working on that, but it’s still my reality, despite my apparent control of my schedule. Time pressure seems inescapable.

Amidst the frenetic pace of society and our busy-ness (real or created), can anyone find the luxury of time to fulfill our desires to be who we want to be in the world? That is a shift away from paying attention strictly to how to spend our time, to who we are. Instead of asking what do I want/need to do with my time today, one could ask, who do I want be today. Brendan Burchard suggests beginning every day by asking this question. I love this exercise because no matter how much or how little time or control over your time that you feel you have, you do have control over your behavior in that time.

This kind of shift–from feeling controlled by commitments to controlling one’s time to achieve purpose–is exactly what I endeavor to help people make through health coaching sessions. And yet, it still doesn’t answer the question of time. If being a good listener is the person my friend and I both want to be, not only must we devote the qualities of attention, stillness and non-judgment in those moments, but true listening also takes time. In order to feel heard, people need to be able to speak their whole truths, and sometimes it’s a round-about, messy process of getting to what they need to say. That is to say, it can take a long time to get to what a person needed to say in the first place.

It has been a particularly interesting time to grapple with such questions. I had recently spent hours listening to my boyfriend’s 18-year-old son get a lot off his chest. I didn’t feel impatient to end the conversation and get some work done. I wanted to listen to him for as long as he had to speak, but also as long as I could before I needed to leave for the open house later that day, that I’d created for my new office space.

There was plenty else I could have been doing during those hours, and plenty on my to-do list of “shoulds.” But this conversation felt more important. In my mind, I quickly distilled down my day into what absolutely had to be done by what time, and decided that left me hours to listen, and talk, and be the person I wanted to be that day. Here is a clue to a more concrete answer to my friend’s question.

At the end of every coaching session I ask my clients, what is your homework for next time? We usually try to come up with three concrete, doable tasks. I ask them to consider what came out in our conversation and the goals they are working towards.  If this was a session with my friend (the one who asked the question that started this whole musing), how might I end it?

Unfortunately, when she asked me the question, we didn’t have enough time (or privacy) for me to ask her more about when she feels conflicted, what exactly was going on for her in those moments, and how she might change her approach to achieve the balance she seeks in her daily life.

Rather I’ve meandered here through my own complicated relationship with spending time listening to others. (Thank you, reader, for listening.) Thus I suppose I’ll have end with three pieces of concrete advice I’d give myself, and hope you find them useful in your own life.

  1. At the beginning of the day, first ask myself, what adjective describes who I want to be today? Try to behave this way in the situations I encounter today,  as well as using this focus to decide how I will spend my time.
  2. Create both structure and space with my time: Each day, instead of cramming a lot of tasks into my schedule or generating a long to do list, consider only today’s one to three most important priorities—those which lead me to larger goals or are necessary to meet today’s true obligations. Leave myself ample unscheduled time. Acknowledge my tendency to underestimate the time it takes to accomplish tasks and snags I might run into. (Sound familiar? Most of us make this mistake in scheduling.) Leave additional time for unforeseen opportunities or challenges that might come up during the day.
  3. In my practice of listening, I plan to fully listen by talking less. I will try to remember that I don’t always need to give advice, but rather ask good questions and mirror back what I hear the person saying. As for timing and boundaries for such listening, I will keep in touch with how much time I can devote to these interactions by paying attention to: my must-do’s, time to take care of myself, and the spaces I’ve now wisely left in my schedule. I will use this daily practice to set clear boundaries for myself and mindfully communicate them to others, whether verbally or through the subtlety of body language.

Reader, what role does listening play in your life? I’d love to hear your reflections in the comments.

You’re Invited to an Open House

From Here to Well-Being has a New Home!

Join us for an Open House in celebration of my new office space

4-6 pm, Thursday, December 13, 2018

*Add your positive energy to my new space
*Enjoy healthy snacks and refreshments
*Make new friends
*Ask about nutrition news that has you wondering
*Find out about individual or group health coaching

120 West Ave, Suite 208
Saratoga Springs, NY 12866

Find us one floor above Kaffee House

RSVP

Should You Go Low Carb? Making Sense of the Latest Study

“Low Carb Diets Can Help Keep the Weight Off,” shout the latest headlines. You can read about a study newly published in the highly respected medical journal, BMJ. An article New York Times to gives useful background and caveats. Or you might run across the bold headline without much nuance from other news outlets. You could even wade through the original study (as I did). Whatever your source, you may be asking (once again), is this (low carb)  The Right Diet for You?

To the debate I’d like to add two pieces of wisdom that might help you come to terms with the new study as well as the barrage of often contradictory diet advice in general:

  1. Studies show trends amongst groups of people. The larger and more comprehensive the study, (and the better the experimental methods and measures) the more reliably you can say that the trend applies to most people in the total population. However, you are only one person, and many factors affect your digestion and metabolism. What applies to most people may apply to you (as a single data point) a lot, a little, or even not at all.
  2. Studies often focus on a particular population, and in studies of weight loss, most of the studies use participants in a particular BMI range. The study in question, for instance, used participants whose BMIs were over 25 (considered overweight) and with a body weight less than 160 kg (353 pounds). That could mean these results would not apply to people with significantly greater or lower BMIs/weights.

So what does this mean for you and carbs? It means that low carb diets may be useful for many people, at least in the range of BMI’s studied.  Which, in turn, suggests it might be useful to try such a diet, especially if other weight loss diets you’ve tried have either not worked or initially worked and then stopped working.

That said, it is vitally important when considering starting a new diet to:

  1. Check with your doctor(s) to make sure the diet is safe for you, given your medical history, conditions, and medications.
  2. Do your research. Read about the diet from reputable sources to make sure you understand what you should eat, as well as what you should not. On a low carb diet, for instance, you don’t limit fat. I’ve mentioned in other posts these three books I like: The Art and Science of Low Carbohydrate Living, The New Atkins, and Fat for Fuel.
  3. Check in with yourself. Can this diet be aligned with your beliefs and sustainable long term?
  4. Find support. It’s quite difficult to succeed in any big dietary change. You might need to enlist the support of your loved ones and/or outside help in the form of a health coach, nutritionist, or support group.

 

 

The Water, Green Veggies and Seeds Diet

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WHAT IF you avoided all foods which might not be healthy?

I recently sat down to talk diet with a couple who were knowledgeable about various well-researched diet advice yet still confused—as are most people these days—about what exactly to eat and what to eliminate. I struggle with these questions myself.

This couple was committed to eating the best foods possible and avoiding those which might be harmful, in order to improve their health and well-being. They had already embarked on their journey of eating less sugar and processed foods. I explained that this change, as well as much of the additional advice, was sound and yet, one could not possibly follow all the advice at once.

Why not? Consider first what would happen if you did  try to follow all that dietary advice at once.

WHAT WOULD BE LEFT TO EAT?

By themselves, many scientifically proven diets are at least reasonable experiments. If you try accommodate all the restrictions of several reasonable diets, however, you’d make a crazy Venn Diagram of the dietary overlap, and are sadly left with quite a narrow selection of yes-foods:

  • Organic cruciferous vegetables (such as broccoli, kale, and cauliflower)
  • Berries and avocadoes (but not other fruits)
  • Olive oil
  • Seeds
  • Water

Not only would this be a depressingly limited diet, it is also missing or low in key nutrients (such as protein) and micronutrients that have been shown to be beneficial and may themselves help stave off many chronic diseases.

How did I come up with my list? Here is a selection of well-documented potentially healthy diets, and their dietary no’s.

POTENTIAL FOOD ALLERGENS AND SENSITIVIES

One way to improve your health is to avoid foods that you are allergic or sensitive to. One way to do so is to cut out the top six most common food allergens. Excluding from your diet:

  • eggs
  • soy
  • wheat
  • nuts and tree nuts
  • milk
  • fish and shellfish

Even if you don’t know you are allergic or sensitive to these foods, they may be causing symptoms and/or inflammation in your gut and in your body. To be safe, some experts suggest you might avoid all of these foods, at least on a trial basis, as in an elimination diet (more on these techniques later).

LOW FODMAP DIET

You might also reduce your choices by going on a low FODMAP diet which lowers the amount of certain kinds of carbohydrates which can cause digestive disorders in some people. That means avoiding as much as possible:

  • Fructose: fruits, honey, and high fructose corn syrup
  • Lactose: dairy
  • Fructans (inulin): wheat, onion, and garlic
  • Galactans: beans, lentils, and legumes like soy
  • Polyols: sweeteners containing sorbitol, mannitol, xylitol, maltitol, and stone fruits, such as avocado, apricots, cherries, nectarines, peaches, and plums

Some experts suggest trying to eliminate these foods even if you don’t have IBS or another bowel disease, because improper digestion can lead to a host of other systemic problems.

PLANT-BASED DIET

Many studies show that vegetarians tend to live longer and have fewer chronic diseases, and therefore many experts suggest reducing or cutting out animal foods and products. If you’ve added the diets above, you have already eliminated soy, eggs, and dairy products as sources of protein; now  imagine the restricted diet above without red meat, pork, or poultry, either.

LOW CARBOHYDRATE DIET

While the lowfat (and resultingly high carbohydrate) diet has been shown to produce more problems than it solves, a low carbohydrate diet, even one as low in “good carbs” as a ketogenic diet, has been shown in a good number of studies to help overweight people lose body fat and maintain muscle mass. Some researchers tout its benefits as an anti-cancer diet. To follow this diet most people include animal or soy products to get protein as you eliminate:

  • Starchy vegetables such as potatoes and corn
  • Grains (even whole grains grain substitutes like quinoa which are all very high in carbohydrates)
  • Most, legumes including most beans and bean products
  • Sugar, agave
  • All fruit juice and most fruits, except low sugar fruits like berries, coconut, and avocadoes

THE ANTI-INFLAMMATORY DIET

Dr. Andrew Weil is one authority on a diet that reduces inflammation and therefore all kinds of chronic diseases and conditions. While we’re subtracting here, I should note that here are a number of foods specifically advocated as anti-inflammatory which are prohibited by the diets above including dairy, egg, poultry, fish, soy, stone fruits, whole grains, and legumes. Below are foods Dr. Weil concludes are inflammatory, and should be reduced or avoided:

  • Processed foods and fast food.
  • Wheat flour
  • Sugar
  • Coffee
  • Most animal protein
  • Saturated fat from animal foods but also including palm kernel oil.
  • Safflower and sunflower oils, corn oil, cottonseed oil, and mixed vegetable oils.
  • No margarine, vegetable shortening, and particularly partially hydrogenated vegetable oil, and avoid products with these ingredients.
  • Avoid conventionally grown crops which are most likely to carry pesticide.

Ok, Rachel, you are saying. Don’t do them all at once. I get it. But what is a strategy for figuring out what is right for me?  Here’s one sensible way to eat good foods and determine which questionable foods do and do not work in your system at this time.

WHAT TO DO?

FOOD JOURNAL

You could skip to the basic healthy diet steps below for health reasons right away, but you might also learn from keeping a pre-intervention food journal. For at least a week, keep detailed records of what you eat and how you feel: hunger, fullness, energy level, emotions, digestion, and in terms of any of your chronic conditions. See if you can find correlations between certain foods and how you felt during and after eating. Pay attention to when you are eating as well and notice if there is a pattern to your reactions to foods depending on when you’re eating them and also under what circumstances (such as with family, alone, over the sink, in the car, at your desk at work).

EAT WHAT MOST EVERYONE AGREES IS HEALTHY: BASIC WHOLE FOOD DIET

Do eat plenty of all the foods under “what’s left” (at top) unless you know (or have a hunch) that a particular food creates discomfort, allergy, or sensitivity in your system. Whatever you eat, go for the least processed, freshest, organic if possible, whole foods. Eat a whole-food meal plan including an abundance of cruciferous veggies, and plenty of healthy fats (doing your best to maximize fats from various fruit (avocadoes), vegetables, nuts and seeds). Drink more water. If you eat meat and/or eggs, or dairy, look for free range or grass-fed. Keep or continue food diary as above.

AVOID THE EASY NO-NO’S

  • Processed foods
  • Sugar and corn syrup in their many forms, especially soda and packaged food
  • Partially hydrogenated vegetable oil
  • Food laden with pesticides, hormones, or antibiotics

Continue your food diary. If you “fall off the wagon” pay close attention to how you feel afterward.

EXERCISE

Begin or continue an exercise program. Yes, exercise may make you hungrier. But not only does it help burn calories and fat, studies show that exercise helps change the most dangerous kinds of fat into a healthier form. I won’t go into detail here, but I cannot talk about diet and health without mentioning exercise. In brief: you should get an average of at least 30 minutes a day of moderate cardio, in addition to strength, balance, and stretching in your exercise routine. Many studies show that high intensity interval training two or three times a week (in place of moderate cardio those days) for short periods is extremely beneficial in terms of overall health and for weight loss. One resource on the topic I enjoyed was Dr. Jordan Metzl‘s The Exercise Cure.

Give this program (food journal, whole foods diet, avoiding easy no-no’s, and exercise) at least 10 days and see if you don’t already start feeling better and/or losing weight!

EXPERIMENTAL PHASE: WHAT WORKS FOR YOUR INDIVIDUAL SYSTEM?

Everyone is different, and nutritional needs vary across the lifespan. While one diet may be the healthiest for your significant other, it may not serve you as well depending on your metabolism, gut biome, history, medical conditions, food sensitivities or allergies, and even beliefs about food.

CLUES FROM YOUR FOOD DIARY

Eliminate foods that made you feel low energy gave you digestive discomfort or in any way seemed to make you feel unhealthy or increased unhealthy cravings.

ELIMINATION DIET

 To get the most out of your elimination diet and to do it safely and without feeling deprived, get help from a health coach, nutritionist, functional medicine doctor or follow a good book or website. In this case you would likely try eliminating either the six common allergens or  eating a low FODMAP diet, usually for at least four to six weeks. (You wouldn’t usually do both diets at once, but could do them sequentially.) If you begin to feel better in any way or begin to effortlessly lose weight, one or more of the foods you eliminated may have been causing you a problem. Then you would add back each food, one at a time, as recommended, to see if symptoms return.

Resource:  Segersten and Malterre‘s The Elimination Diet

LOW CARB or ANTI-INFLAMMATION OR OTHER HEALTHY DIET?

If you still have symptoms or need to lose (additional) weight or want to be even healthier and live longer, you may try one of the other diets described above. Leave out any foods you have found to be bad for your system, of course. Be sure to use a professional or a good book to help you not only avoid certain foods, but to consume plenty of the foods that are good for you and acceptable according to the chosen diet. Do I need to mention: one diet at a time?

Resources:

  • Two of my favorite low carb authors: Volek and Phinney‘s scholarly The Art and Science of Low Carbohydrate Living, or their more general guide, The New Atkins, and Joseph Mercola‘s Fat for Fuel 
  • Dr. Andrew Weil’s Advice on Anti-Inflammatory Diet

 

WHAT ABOUT MEAT?

While just about all the experts agree that plenty of plant matter is good most people’s health and longevity, it is not clear whether or not a low meat, vegetarian or vegan diet might be the healthiest diet for you at this moment in your life.  You can experiment with your food journal on this topic, keeping an open mind about how much, what kind, and if any animal products you might include in your diet.

COULD YOU USE SOME SUPPORT?

If you think you’d like help navigating the confusing world of dietary dilemmas, click the link on the top right side of this page to set up a free initial consultation and find out if health coaching could help you make sense of what to eat for your body’s needs.

Well-Being In the Face of Stress, Serious Injury or Illness

In times of great stress, illness, or injury, our self-care, healthy habits, and sense of well-being may seem out of reach. Yet deep down we know that the same techniques that sustain and improve our well-being in easier times become even more vital when things go wrong.

When I sustained a concussion and subsequent post-concussive syndrome, I felt depressed, not only as a symptom of the syndrome, but also because I wasn’t doing the things that made me feel like myself and brought me happiness. I took it easy with exercise and stopped beloved activities that could possibly bump my head again; I didn’t expose myself to anything that hurt my brain like sound, light, certain movements, or reading. I felt I needed to protect my brain rather than pushing myself hard enough to kick it back into working for me as normally as possible. 

I wasn’t only held back by fear. Looking back on that dark time (literally—I wore super dark sunglasses and kept the shades closed all day), I realize I didn’t try very hard to make myself feel emotionally better because I didn’t feel worthy since I was unable to work. No longer teaching, I didn’t have a clear sense of purpose. I also didn’t have someone in my life nudging me towards habits that would foster well-being. 

Sure, I had lots of doctors and therapists, and they did, in the end, help me get through, but following are some suggestions I’ve learned as a health coach and through my research into illness and well-being that I wish somebody had told me.

Take time to nurture yourself (using the suggested practices below), even if you feel pressed or exhausted by doctors’ recommendations or stress of having too much to do for others or work.  Otherwise you will be no good to anyone.

Personally I also had to stop identifying as a person with a concussion, focusing on my symptoms, to justify to myself why I was not back at work. You don’t have to identify as a victim of your illness or circumstance, or devalue yourself if you are unable to work or do what you normally do to give you joy and even identity. I may not have been able to throw myself into a classroom of teenagers or into whitewater paddling or telemark skiing, but when I began to include more rigorous exercise (actually prescribed by the concussion clinic) and getting out of the house to interact with people (even if only at the Y), I started to feel more positive. I slowly realized I deserved a fulfilling life. And don’t we all, as human beings deserve to live our best lives?

Good news: you can start with any of these habit changes; even small positive practices can create momentum to make a “virtuous cycle,” which is the opposite of the vicious cycle of not adequately taking care of yourself and feeling worse. In a virtuous cycle, each step towards a meaningful, healthy goal lifts you out of the downward spiral and begins to create an upward spiral instead.

    1. Self-Care: Exercise, getting adequate sleep, eating nutritious food, and staying hydrated are foundational to feeling better and improving health. Even when exercise is difficult, getting moving is key for healing. The same is true for restorative sleep, nutritious food and plenty of water. Pressed for time or energy? Take baby steps, maybe in one realm at a time. Each step not only improves your health, but also, the more sleep, exercise, healthy food, and water you get, the more vitality and productivity you will have. As you reach adequate amounts of each (I’ll cover specifics in another blog), you’ll end up with both more time and energy to do what you need to do.
    1. Social support is well documented as a having a protective role in health and well-being. Reach out to friends, family or support groups. Find ways to strengthen your connections to community and actively work on your important relationships. Studies of populations who live the longest, healthiest lives show that these connections are keys to happiness and healthy longevity.
    1. Mindfulness has been shown to decrease anxiety, pain, and improve many measures of health. Recommended reading on mindfulness: Jon Kabat-Zinn, Full Catastrophe Living. Some mindfulness techniques include meditative practices that I teach my clients such as:
          • Guided meditations using apps, podcasts, etc.
          • Paying attention to breathing
          • Breathing exercises
          • Body scan
          • Progressive relaxation
          • Noticing sounds and sensations without attaching thoughts
          • Noticing thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations without judgment
          • Visualization (often guided)
          • Loving-kindness meditation
          • Practicing gratitude
    1. Finding meaning and purpose.  Ask yourself, what are you doing in your life that provides meaning and purpose (e.g. helping others, being with family, political participation)? Decide what activities you can increase (or decrease) to align with your meaning and purpose. For me, studying health, learning coaching skills, and as a health coach, helping others individually, brings me tremendous satisfaction. I also look at my to-do list for “not-to-do’s”: items I felt (for whatever reason) I ought to do, but are not aligned with my purposes of health coaching and my own well-being. Cross ‘em off!
    1. Find flow, joy and challenge. Choose everyday activities to improve your sense of well-being.  
      1. Flow is a state of complete absorption in an activity that gives just the right amount of challenge. Try a challenging puzzle or hobby (for me, hula hooping tricks). 
      2. Schedule and engage in activities that promote joy and creativity. Give yourself permission and put it in your calendar.
      3. Give yourself achievable challenges to meet goals meaningful to your life and which will promote a sense of purpose, optimism, mastery and personal control.

How does health coaching help in the face of serious illness or stress?

A health coach listens to the client to:

    1. Discover what is meaningful to the individual person
    2. Identify relevant and attainable goals for the client. Help devise goals that are concrete and immediate, relevant to personal values and not overwhelming. These goals usually relate to the practices outlined above
    3. Emphasize opportunities for personal control (especially in cases of feeling helpless). Meeting even minor goals can provide a sense of control of one’s life.
    4. Encourage behaviors to meet these goals by providing support, guidance, accountability and actionable steps. With the client the health coach can create a plan of working towards goals. The process of moving towards the goal is in itself satisfying and keeps a person engaged in life.
    5. Revise goals if they are not working or to meet changing needs.Encourage positivity by helping clients recall positives in own lives and schedule activities that give a sense of achievement and joy.

Health Coaching has been shown to provide vital roles in promoting well-being while facing chronic illness. According to an American Academy of Family Physicians 2016 report, health coaches help clients in five main roles:

  1. Self-management support: provide information, promote behavior change, encourage follow-up and participation 
  2. Create a bridge between physician and patient. A health coach can work with the provider to explain the care plan, become a liaison and an advocate.
  3. Empower the person in navigating the health care system.
  4. Provide emotional support.
  5. Provide continuity—trust, familiarity, availability and time to follow up 

Will health coaching support you in increasing your quality of life? Rachel is pleased to offer a free initial consultation. During this consultation you will clarify your well-being goals and needs, and get a sense of working with Rachel. Schedule today with the link to the right of the page or by email or by phone.

 info@rachelkurtzhealthcoach.com • 518-350-4434

How I Signed my First Five Clients

Very Small Business Owners: A Healthy Glow and Following my Passion Attracted Clients:

Stressing out about your website, blogging, social media, email blasts to bring in clients? I was. But which brought me my first clients? None of the above. I have a website, a (quiet) social media presence and lots of plans to improve and add blog posts and newsletters. I love to write, so I feel I, of all people, ought to be getting on top of all that. Still, my first group of clients came much more organically, through the kind of networking that feels most natural to me: in person. Here’s how it happened:

 

  1. I walk my talk. I look healthy and when people talk to me and notice my positive attitude, my smile, my healthy glow, and strong arms, they want to have some of what I’m having. (Yes, I wear tank tops and people comment on my arms!) Maybe you believe as I did at one time, that a health coach ought to look like she just walked out of the pages of a women’s health magazine to be that role model. I don’t. I also don’t do anything extraordinary: I eat lots vegetables, drink water, get outside, exercise regularly and generally get enough sleep. Those health habits plus my positivity are enough.

 

  1. I talk to everyone I know and everyone I meet about what I’m doing. My enthusiasm and optimism are contagious. My first client came to me this way.

 

  1. I look for opportunities to talk to people about their health as well as health coaching. I joined a “Senior Expo” at my local Y, allowed people to leave me their info for me to contact them for a health history, (which I call the free initial consultation) and gained client number two.

 

  1. I make it easy for people to schedule an initial consultation (health history) by providing a place to put their contact information if they want me to contact them (rather than having them lose my card or put off calling). For my first event (more below) I actually created specific slots for consultations and encouraged people to sign up for specific dates and times before they’d even left the venue.

 

  1. I created an event building on my passion for mindfulness and healthy eating which, while small, was very effective in attracting the kind of people who are interested in working with me and I’m excited to work with. I partnered with my local health food store to create a guided mindful eating experience. Through this experience I discovered my target audience: people who are already interested in health and looking for support outside of/in addition to mainstream medicine to become healthier and gain a greater sense of well-being. Three more clients signed with me as a result of an event I loved creating.

Bagel and Rice as Unhealthy as Frosted Cake?

Why Added Sugar is Not the Whole Story

As you gaze into a bakery or vending machine, I don’t need to tell you that tempting treats such as cake, doughnuts, or candy or not good for you. But did you know that a bagel, white rice, and apple juice may be just as harmful? That is, at least when it comes to their effects on your blood sugar.
If you are concerned about your blood sugar, you may be aware that certain foods cause a spike in blood sugar which, in turn, can cause insulin spikes. You may even understand that over time, overconsumption of these foods may lead to type 2 diabetes. How much a particular food raises the blood sugar level is measured by the glycemic index (GI), and higher glycemic index foods tend to spike blood sugar while lower ones do not. This chart shows that white rice has a higher glycemic index than a doughnut.

So, No More Rice?

To be clear, as a health coach I am not prescribing a diet. Not only would that be outside my scope of practice, but also diet and metabolism are highly individual, so no one diet is right for everyone. Instead I provide information to help others make sense of the conflicting dietary information out there and make their own, informed decisions about what diet and lifestyle changes may be appropriate to improve health and well-being. You should also, of course, consult your doctor.
In this vein, I have gathered some information from reputable sources to help you decide if you would like to experiment with food choices based on glycemic index (GI) or a more interesting measure, glycemic load (GL), and if so, how you might do so.

What is Glycemic Load?

Glycemic load of a food equals the glycemic index multiplied by the number of carbohydrates per serving, divided by 100. The result is a number indicating not only how quickly will a food elevate blood sugar, but also the size of the effect. You would think that measure would make both the glycemic index diet advocates and low carb diet promoters happy. In theory, anyway.

What difference does Glycemic Load make?

Scientists, diabetes specialists, and dietitians have come to different conclusions about which is most important in preventing and managing type 2 diabetes: counting carbohydrates, eating low glycemic index foods, or eating foods with a low glycemic load. So…no, they don’t agree.
From my reading and my own perspective, a measure that takes both glycemic index and number of carbs into account at once can be a useful number in considering whether or not to consume a particular food. Indeed, the Linus Pauling Institute at the Oregon State University, considering multiple studies, supports the use of glycemic load in prevention and management of type 2 diabetes.

What is the Glycemic Load of Your Favorite Foods?

Check out how your diet stacks up. Here is a chart of glycemic load of common foods from Oregon State University. As you look through these numbers keep in mind:
  • >10 GL: Foods with a glycemic load (GL) under 10 are labeled as low-GL foods. These foods do not significantly raise blood sugar levels.
  • 10-20 GL: Foods with a GL between 10 and 20 are considered moderate-GL foods which have a more significant impact on blood sugar.
  • 20+ GL: Foods above 20 GL are high-GL foods which tend to cause blood sugar spikes.

Some Strategies for lowering the Glycemic Load of Your Diet

(from the same article from Oregon State)
  • Eat more whole grains, nuts, legumes, fruit, and non-starchy vegetables.
  • Eat fewer starchy moderate to high GL foods such as potatoes, white rice and white bread
  • Limit consumption of sugary treats such as cookies, cakes, candy and soft drinks

Could You Use Some Help in Changing Your Diet or Lifestyle?

As a health coach I’m here not only to provide you with information, but also to help you implement changes to improve your health and well-being. If you think you might benefit from support as you embark on your journey towards a healthier, happier you, contact me today to set up a free no-obligation initial consultation. 

 

Links to Further Info on GI, GL, and Carbohydrates
  • The American Diabetes Association’s take on GI and carbohydrate intake.
  • Harvard Medical School’s “lowdown” on GI and GL
  • Article from Huffington Post on GI vs GL
  • A  scholarly look from the Linus Pauling Institute at Oregon State University, at the evidence for GI vs GL in treatment and prevention of type 2 diabetes

 

Is it selfish to take the time and money to care for your health and wellbeing?

Imagine what would your life be like if you…

  • Had more energy?
  • Got sick less often?
  • Found it easy to maintain a healthy weight?
  • Handled stressful situations better?
  • Were able to make your key relationships healthier?
  • Felt happier?
  • Found meaning, spirituality, and personal growth?

These are only some of the benefits of taking care of your health and well-being. Now consider how improving even one of these areas of your life would allow you to be better able to take care of your loved ones and your responsibilities.

While you are running around trying to take care of everything and everyone else, you might forget how health and overall wellbeing affects those around you. If you take care of you, you can gain:

  • Energy to do what needs to be done, to take care of others, spend quality time with others
  • Health/Immune Function to stay well to be there for others, accomplish tasks
  • Focus to stay with the most important tasks, to help others, to give your full attention to those you care about
  • An Easier Time Maintaining a Healthy weight which can affect your health and longevity directly and can allow you to focus on more important aspects of your life
  • Equanimity  to handle stressful situations without “losing it”
  • Ability to Maintain and Grow Healthy Relationships The health of your relationships starts with your energy, priorities, ability to calmly communicate
  • Happiness/Joy to bring happiness and joy to others—like bad energy, good energy is also contagious!
  • Other Aspects of Health and Wellbeing such as finding meaning, spirituality, personal growth to help you be a role model to important others in your life.

Take home message: Taking care of yourself is the opposite of selfish; it is vital to everyone around you. From this perspective it seems selfish to neglect taking care of yourself!

Some people fear if they take the time or resources (money, usually) to take care of themselves, they’ll be perceived as selfish. If there’s any money or time we feel like we’re supposed to be spending it on our families or work. We forget that we, too, are part of the family who deserves health and well-being. We may also forget that we are not robots who can work unlimited hours at full potential. We don’t give our loved ones a lot of credit if we don’t even give them the chance to support us in becoming healthier and happier. As for work, ask yourself if you had more energy and focus if you could actually put in fewer extra hours.

I haven’t mentioned the term “self-care” since its image is a little problematic–it might conjure the luxury of a spa day (and, indeed, could include a spa day). Yet, truly taking care of oneself encompasses so much more: from proper sleep, nutrition, exercise, to nourishing relationships, creating meaning and living according to your own moral compass.

I hope you will join me on a journey towards greater health and well-being. For one-on-one help, contact me for a free health coaching consultation on FaceTime from anywhere!